Dear Google: Please Unbreak My Heart!

Once upon a time, Google loved me; and I loved Google.  I’m not sure what happened, but the relationship has gotten pretty rocky lately.  Here’s a video I put together that tells my story…enjoy!

Feel free to comment below…  If its worthy of a “Digg”, go for it!

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26 Responses to “Dear Google: Please Unbreak My Heart!”

  1. Awesome Spencer!! Got a good laugh and a good cry out of that one :))

  2. Haha.

    You nailed it.

    Love hate relationship with big G.

    This might be viral.

  3. I’m feeling this video today – very frustrating to see my sites with original content that adds user value at the 200th place in Google, while spammy sites that add no value are on the first page.

    Hopefully it doesn’t last forever. Google take me back!

  4. This might even move Matt Cutts to tears!

  5. You definitely are not the only one. It happened to me too and I have no idea why.

    That’s what I hate about google. They can control the lifeblood of your business and on a whim, totally destroy your rankings and not even tell you what you did wrong.

    If you question them, you get the standard form letter about following google guidelines. Well I did that, as I’m sure most of us who were slapped did. And I still lost my rank and even had one site de-indexed.

    It’d sure be nice to know why the big G does the things they do. And I sure wish we didn’t have to rely on them for traffic.

    Love the video!

  6. Google is very picky and finnicky. I do not rely on them for 100% of my traffic.

    Funny video !

  7. ROTFL That was a great way to start my day.

  8. Brilliant dude! Just. Plain. Brilliant!

  9. Here’s my today’s personal point of view –

    Not the first time with me – I just read those 3 articles and convinced myself one more time that google is a stupid overcomplicated machine run by a crowd of assholes got brazen and thinking to rule the online universe.

    I don’t care about the google’s rules since these rules are being changed all the time without notifying me – I will play by my own rules.

    Rules are simple and rude – either we f#@k google, or google f#@ks us. Choose.

  10. Wow thats nice !!! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry, somehow just left feeling frustrated… Best of luck with the new try!!

  11. Wow. Awesome video Spencer. Hilarious. I could not stop laughing. Love the Weezer choice too by the way. Can we expect more videos in the future….and do you have any past videos that I could check out?

    • Alright Shooter…glad you came back for more. I thought you might like this one. Yep, its actually the Weezer song that inspired this video. I got their new album this week: “Death to False Metal”, and when I heard the song I was looking at my sad Google rankings…then the idea was born!
      I’m sure there will be more videos. You can check out my Youtube channel for other videos:

  12. O.K. someone has TOO much time on their hands.. 😀

    Hope your not using GA on that new site… I never use their analytics, all that data they gather can be used against you! :-O

    Thanks for the chuckle! :)

    P.S. My friend Google thinks your new site is cute and would like to get together some time? 😀

    • Yep, I spent about 2 hours working on this late last night. I could have slept instead, but this was more fun!

      NO GOOGLE ANALYTICS anymore! In fact, I already installed PIWIK web analytics.

      PS – You only think you have a friend named Google :)

  13. not working for me… error try later??

  14. Banned = adsense account gone
    Deindexed = site does not show up during ‘’
    Not Ranking = site isn’t ranking, but does show on ‘’

    I’m assuming you were deindexed, but not banned?

  15. Spencer: just curious, do most of the affected sites have adsense on them?

    • Yes, they do. Although as discussed, I don’t think this is the real issue. Google Adsense certainly does NOT cause Google to view websites poorly.

  16. I’ve had some major Google slaps in the past. (Nearly 200 seperate sites/URL’s about 18 months ago.)

    I haven’t had a single site delisted or slapped in any ranking since then… What do I do?

    1. I don’t use AdSense ANYWHERE
    2. I don’t use GA or register with any Google webmaster/accounts tools.
    3. I don’t use WordPress. A major signature of quick MFA/niche sites. All are HTML/PHP.
    4. I use all my own original, but ‘spun’ of course, content.

    It’s more work, that’s for sure. I also have some web developer skills – and the ability to write a lot of PHP management and automated tools that run on CRON jobs etc.

    …And I suggest that anyone who’s serious about making money online should learn HTML and PHP and get to grips with Dreamweaver and using wesbite templates at the minimum.

    Contrary to what most people will tell you, it’s not JUST about marketing anymore. If you don’t have some technical skills going forward then you’re going to be left in the mud. The online landscape is seriously changing, as well as the SEO methods that work. The old stuff that used to work is really slowing down.

    If you’re expecting to sit back and make a good full-time living just by analysing keywords/longtails and banging up WordPress sites, then you’re going to get a nasty shock very soon. If not now, then sometime over the next few years.

    …But, the bottom line is when are YOU going to take control of your business – and stop giving Google the tools it needs to make your life difficult?

    I don’t know about you, but I want to create a BUSINESS, not just a part-time ‘mess-around’ income. That requires a proper business attitude, some industry training, and facing the hard market factors – and then dealing with them.

    Everyone get’s complacent and seems to expect Google to just let them make easy’ish money. They’re an annoying and totally holier-than-thou company, who are anti-commercial to small business; but that doesn’t change the fact that you have to deal with them. I, for one, seriously hope that the new ‘BingHoo’ gives them a good walloping… But my business-plan doesn’t rely on it…


    • As much as I don’t like the sound of it, I think you make some very valid points, Sites should deliver quality content, not just for the spider, something that gets lost in the quicky setups.

      I don’t think using ad-sense creates the problem, but when ad-sense becomes the focus of the site it delivers a lot of junk clicks for the advertiser and Google doesn’t really like that.